The Seven Veils

The first veil is the herd;
country, tribe or state.
The herd fears the other herds.
Drop this veil and retain yourself.
The second veil is the good;
prudence, pity, light.
The good denies the bad.
Drop this veil and retain your value.
The third veil is value;
truth, wealth and vitality.
Value denies freedom.
Drop this veil and lose yourself.
The fourth veil are tongues;
words, commands, preaching.
It denies understanding, but says otherwise.
Drop this veil and obtain the truth.
The fifth veil is love;
procreation, self-pity.
Love denies everything else.
Drop this veil, and feel everything
The sixth veil is faith;
god, justice, revenge.
Faith denies reason.
Drop this veil and know.
The last veil, the seventh, is you;
ego, me, me and me.
You are afraid of being you.
You want to be me.
Drop this veil, and be the world.

On the Art of Life

Hell, it’s been some time since I wrote my last blog entry.
I’m going to continue on the story I worked on when I was analyzing my apparently inherent dualism.
I don’t know if everyone who read my previous post knows I decided on my big conundrum which of the two (autonomous visual arts or philosophy) I was going to study, so here it is: I am now a student of philosophy, and not only that, but I’m also doing extremely well (at least, I’m pretty sure I do).
After these few months many things have already changed in me, and I must say, it feels great! First of all, I have embraced my contradictory nature, which led to a fruitful alliance of opposites; something I never expected to happen. I feared internal conflict.
I do not feel like a stranger anymore. Not to myself, and not to others.
The funny thing is that I always expected this to happen when my quest for religion would be complete. That I needed a religion for my self-fulfillment. Religions also claim that themselves, that they, as it were, can provide fulfillment of the self.
What irony, then, to truly be able to be one’s self through the rejection of these things! I rejected God, heaven, truth, eternity, meaning, unity, perfection as illusions. I finally awoke from this nightmare called religion. I live an entirely new life now. I have a different outlook entirely, now.
I want to be the ultimate artist. Not only in the disciplines we know as art – although in their case I decided to focus on music and poetry – but also in philosophy (especially philosophy as an art of life and cultural philosophy), and my own spirituality, truth and morality (which need not be religious – I am artistically spiritual). My life, as a whole, will be my work of art.
Even my contradictory nature, which I found so strange, and perhaps dangerous, has now been transformed into my greatest gift to myself. I am not Nikolaos or Alexander anymore. I am both.
I am independently dependent, religiously atheist, actively nihilistic, mercifully resolute, decadent yet decent, scientifically artistic, terrible yet kind, arrogant yet modest, melancholically choleric, a idealistic realist and an optimistic pessimist. Most of these traits even vice versa as well.
In short, I am rationally intuitive, and intuitively rational.
Every feeling, sensation, experience, thought, insight, etc. I make or have is analyzed rationally, and responded to intuitively, or, again, vice versa, but always consciously. I can think of a mistake I make at the moment that it is made, for example.
It’s funny, really, Nietzsche, who is one of the philosophers I admire most in the world, said the exact same thing about himself. He too, was a walking contradiction. That is why he is the only philosopher with whom it will never be possible for me to disagree.
The third factor, of course, and perhaps most important, is the fact that I started fencing again, which makes me feel healthier and stronger every time. So now I have my body under control, as well. Body, Mind and Spirit – the three who are one.
The most bizarre thing is that not only do I look in a different way at the world around me, but that I also see different – sharper, clearer. My empathic skills have doubled. I can now, with little or no information, have insight on people, objects and the world around me.
I sometimes think that, if I keep going like this, no one will be able to stop me – I already am throwing myself gleefully upon any challenge. Perhaps I’ll change the world entirely. Perhaps not, perhaps I’ll decide I don’t want to. Perhaps I’ll be a great guru.
But my aspiration stands: I want to become the Übermensch – not because Nietzsche told me so, but because that is the most natural thing for me to want. I want to become Buddha. I want to be Metatron.
Artist, warrior, and philosopher.
I want everyone to want this for him- or herself.
I, and my generation are a sign that the next evolutionary step of humanity is, indeed, possible.
And trust me when I say that I have seen several individuals like me, from my generation. Our consciousness is evolving – and it is glorious!
My advice to you is this: Be who you want to be, but do it actively, passionately and fearlessly. There are many difficulties and hindrances you will have to deal with before you can do this, however. And the greatest difficulty is doubt. Doubt about yourself, and doubt about the world around you. This is a hindrance you can overcome with reason. Abstract your personality. Try to distill every trait you know you have. Try to know every aspect of yourself. Think hard and long. Meditate. Realise the sheer quantity of aspects within you, and the meaninglessness, the emptiness of it all. When you finally know yourself, without any doubt, you will know the world. When you know yourself, you can love yourself, without becoming a narcissist. When you love yourself in this way you can also love the world, and everyone who, like you, lives within it.
I’m not advocating ataraxia, or passivity when I’m talking about meaninglessness. I’m talking about endless possibilities, when I’m talking about emptiness. Like Lao Tzu said: “We value a bowl, because of its emptiness.”. The emptiness is valuable, because you can fill it any way you desire. And be honest. Especially with yourself. You know your intuitions, your faults and accomplishments. Admit them to yourself, because you absolutely can’t fool yourself – and if you try to fool yourself, you’ll have lost.
But, most of all, don’t take my word for it. I mean, as an artist and creator of my life, I am building it the way I am able to build it, with the faculties I have, and with the strengths and weaknesses I have. You will probably have your own way, which is all the better. Just be your own hero, and your own role model, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. We are not narcissists, and not evil – we just know ourselves.
We are manifestations of and monuments to the spirit of humanity.
We are the essence and the substance
We are living paradoxes.

-Alexander N. Arvanitis

Teotl

Englabörn, Chaositect, The Visionary of Dust, Alex Twin, Cowboy Baby Blue, Pink Panther, Teotl, Preacherman, Alexander the Grey, Alex van Kuik, Echolaliá, etc. He goes by many names, three of which are (in no specific order) Alexander Nikolaos Arvanitis, which are the names he is known by in the world you and I are most familiar with. Each name is an autonomous manifestation of his persona. This man is a musical, visual and philosophical chameleon (Teotl). His work is comparable with some kind of flagellation. It is chaotic and it hurts (Chaositect), yet at the same time it is quite gentle and ecstatic (Nikolaos). It is cleansing (Englabörn). Cathartic (The Visionary of Dust). Melody and rhythm are certainly available here (Alex Twin), even though both are quite blurred, as are the borders between them; he has, however, been known for his vile, harsh, chaotic and destructive decompositions, behind the mask of his persona known as the Chaositect… He also has a few gentler aspects which surface from time to time (Cowboy Baby Blue, Englabörn or Echolaliá), which are frowned upon by most of his other aspects; even so, they have created several interestingly beautiful blueprints which are being incorporated within this man’s personality vault complex as we speak. This page should function as a small introduction into his complex of personality vaults, tunnels, mausoleums, halls and sewers. I, however, who am the first one to have entered these vaults and lived to tell the story, and even return to that vault from time to time, must warn you, for it is truly a Labyrinth, and truly a horror to behold, yet at the same time, it’s a beauty of beauties, in its eternal confusion and loss and sadness. There are small sparks of hope to be found in this vault, which will light your way through his doom. Believe me if I say that you will need these sparks as much as he will need you. Safe journey, my friend, and perhaps I’ll see you in these vaults… Yours truly, -Nicodemus Alastor

My album collection

I decided to write a post about my CD collection. Here you will find the CDs I have in my collection in alphabetical order, so be prepared. Also, I will include a short comment on each CD, so you know what kind of music it is, if you don’t know the artist or the album.

Fasten your belts, ‘cuz here we go!

Acid Mothers Temple & the Paraiso UFO – La Nóvia
The Japanese gods of Neo-psychedelia in all their glory… Undescribable.

All About Eve – All About Eve
All About Eve – Scarlet and other Stories
A British folksy goth pop band from the mid 80s. They turned shoegaze in the early nineties, and then went on hiatus. They’re deeply romantic, and almost hippie-like. And Juliane Regan has got one of the most naive and sweet voices ever.

Amiina – Kurr
An Icelandic girl quartet, who also play the strings in albums by Sigur Rós. Their music is very different from Sigur Rós, though. They’re more like fairy music, incorporating little things like Glockenspiel, singin saws and wineglasses. Simply magical.

And Also the Trees – Angelfish
A British post punk/goth rock band turned melancholy Americana at their later stage (Angelfish is one of the Americana albums). Really cool guys.

…And You Will Know Us From The Trail Of Dead – Worlds Apart
Except for having the privilege of having one of the coolest band names ever (second only to the Legendary Pink Dots), these guys are also extremely great musicians. Somewhere on the verge between Smashing Pumpkin-esque art rock and almost emo-like indie music, with lots of strings, and great lyrics. Really nice stuff.

Tori Amos – Little Earthquakes
The goddess of redhead musical femmes fatales, Tori Amos writes a musical atonement in A Little Earthquake that sends shivers through my spine, everytime I listen to her. And at the same time she’s as memorable and poppy as heck.

Ataraxia – Suenos
The Italian masters of neoclassical, neo-medieval folk music, who owe more to Dead Can Dance than they want to admit, yet at the same time are quite refreshing. Also deeply magical music.

Bauhaus – 1979-1983 Volume One
The fathers of goth rock in all their glory. A beautifully paranoid collection of songs about fear, darkness and vampires. Harhar.

Björk – Debut
Björk – Post
Björk – Vespertine
What can I say about Björk, that hasn’t been said before. These three albums are, in my humble opinion, some of her masterpieces.

Blonde Redhead – 23
A mysterious band from New York, consisting of two male Italian twins (one on drums, the other on bass) and a female Japanese guitarist/singer. They’re music is exhilarating and refreshing, and noisy yet calm.

Boris – Pink
The masterpiece of the Japanese Noise Rock/Sludge Metal/Post Metal/Stoner Rock band. Extremely noisy, extremely powerful, extremely stoned.

Burzum – Filosofem
The greatest piece of art the Norse black metal scene ever (and I mean EVER) produced. Hazy, noisy, minimalistic, angst ridden, experimental and, above all, beautiful. Burzum at his best.

Kate Bush – Hounds of Love
The First Lady of prog rock. This, my friend, is Art.

Cabaret Voltaire – The Original Sound of Sheffield ’83/’87. Best Of
Industrial preachers at their most poppy. Really good stuff.

Johnny Cash – The American Recordings
Cash, godfather of country, at his most simple brilliance.

Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds – The Best Of
Nick Cave has always been one of my heroes. Great guy, great music, same lyrics as always… This album contains all of his all-time classics.

Celtic Frost – Into the Pandemonium
Celtic Frost – Monotheist
The fathers of symphonic/gothic/black/death metal in their earliest and latest incarnation. Both albums are simply fantastic. Philosophical, mystical, and full of Weltschmerz.

The Chameleons UK – Strange Times
Atmospheric and surrealistic pop music from the mid 80s. The Chameleons are like the Cure: Irresistible.

Frédéric Chopin – Préludes, Piano Sonata no.2 performed by Martha Argerich
Chopin. The patron saint of musical romanticism, performed by the piano goddess (together with Amos) Martha Argerich. Not a bad combo, no?

Christian Death – Only Theatre of Pain
Christian Death – The Wind Kissed Pictures
The debuts of the two incarnations of the American Goth Rock legends (the Rozz Williams and Valor Kand incarnations respectively).

Clannad – Macalla
Clannad – Banba
The Irish new age stars at their least boring. Not bad for a change. 😀

Clan of Xymox – Medusa
The Dutch dark wave pioneers at their most forbidding. Another great album.

CocoRosie – La Maison de mon Reve
One of the most refreshing interpretations of indie folk.

Cocteau Twins – Garlands
Cocteau Twins – Head over Heels
Cocteau Twins – Treasure
Cocteau Twins – The Pink Opaque
One of the most beautiful and mysterious bands ever. Fraser’s voice is simply the voice of a Goddess (together with 4AD labelmate Lisa Gerrard). Especially Treasure is probably one of the most magical albums ever made.

Cradle of Filth – Nymphetamine
Cradle of Filth – Thornography
These decadent headbangers are simply all a metalhead could ask for. Booming riffs, lyrics that are simply poetry, anger and humor. Not many bands manage to do this.

The Creatures – A Bestiary of
The amazing side project of the punk queen Siouxsie Sioux and her husband. Crazed, frenetic, angry and yet danceable and exciting.

The Cult – Dreamtime
The guitar heroes of the Cult at their most gothic. A very listenable early goth rock album, at their early stages, before joining the hard rock pantheon. This album is so much more interesting than their later heavier works.

The Cure – Pornography
The Cure – Disintegration
And here’s the Cure at their most gothic. Their darkest, most brooding and angst-ridden albums. I love the Cure, alright.

Curve – Doppelgänger
A danceable gothic-esque shoegaze monster. This album is just an explosion of excitement.

Daemonia Nymphe – Daemonia Nymphe
An extremely interesting ensemble of musicians, who use ancient Greek instruments to write music inspired by ancient Greek paganism and rituals.

Danzig – II: Lucifuge
Glenn Danzig at his most pretentious and monstrous. Heavy blues rock, with hammer horror lyrics and visual elements sprinkeld all over. This guy’s Evil Elvis, alright.

Dead Can Dance – Spleen and Ideal
Dead Can Dance – The Serpent’s Egg
The legendary ensemble who always managed to revive ancient musical instruments, without necessarily sounding ancient. Lisa Gerrard, of course, with her godlike voice, and Brendan Perry, with his thoughtful and highly philosophical poetry, are a duo that will never seize to amaze.

Debussy – The Very Best of
A compilation of the legendary French symbolist composer’s most beautiful endeavors.

Deine Lakaien – Kasmodiah
The German dark wavers at their most “quite interesting”. Not a perfect album, but it manages to keep most of the attention.

Delerium – Nuages du Monde
A Canadian electronic music side project by members of the legendary EBM band Frontline Assembly. Lots of collaborations, and lots of beautiful singers from all over the world are featured here.

Depeche Mode – Violator
Well… You don’t think this album would be missing from my collection, do you?

Dimmu Borgir – In Sorte Diaboli
The Norse gods (or devils?) of pretentiousness at their most pretentious. So pretentious and stupid it’s really worth listening!

The Doors – The Doors
Yeah, ok. There’s nothing left to tell about them, either… Legendary.

The Dresden Dolls – Yes, Virginia
Brechtian Punk, as they call themselves. Really one of the most innovative and theatrical bands around.

Echo and the Bunnymen – Crocodiles
The Debut of one of the most successful and smartest British post punk bands. The youthfulness and honesty of this album is always refreshing, as is its simplicity.

Editors – The Back Room
The magnum opus of the most perfect Joy Division clones.

Einstürzende Neubauten – Tabula Rasa
Einstürzende Neubauten – Ende Neu
Two of the least experimental but most beautiful of the Industrial champions from Germany. Blixa Bargeld is my idol.

Brian Eno – Ambient 1
Brian Eno’s ambient manifesto. Innovative and effective, yet at the same time deep and thoughtful.

Enya – Watermark
Enya is the new age legend. And Watermark is her highlight. Beautiful.

Faith & the Muse – Vera Causa
Faith & the Muse – The Burning Season
One of the most interesting, spiritual and “innovative” pagan goth rock bands from the Americas. Especially The Burning Season is an album that has touched me much in the past.

Fields of the Nephilim – Dawnrazor
Fields of the Nephilim – The Nephilim
Fields of the Nephilim – Elizium
Fields of the Nephilim – Earth Inferno
Fields of the Nephilim – Revelations
Nefilim – Zoon
Fields of the Nephilim – Mourning Sun
The occultist goth rock gods from the UK. They’ve been on my top 10 list for about 2 years, and even now are still one of my favorite bands of all time.

Horrified – Deus Diabolus Inversus
An obscure Greek melodic death metal band. My mother sung and played violin in this album. I must say, it’s an amazing album, and the band is extremely underrated.

The Gathering – if_then_else
The Dutch gods of trip rock. I simply love their music, both in their more metal period and in their later experimental works.

Gene Loves Jezebel – Immigrant
Another British goth pop band. This is one of their earlier and more theatrical albums.

Lisa Gerrard – Whale Rider OST
Lisa Gerrards soundtrack for the beautiful Whale Rider movie, is really one of the highlights of the film. So sweet, soft and emotional, it’s hard to believe.

Phillip Glass & Yo Yo Ma – Naqoyqatsi
Glass’s musical rendition of the third film in the -Qatsi trilogy, is almost as mind-blowing as the film itself. Glass in all his glory.

Jean-Michel Jarre – Oxygéne
Okay. All-time classic.

The Jesus and Mary Chain – Psychocandy
The first step towards shoegaze music. Simply the best.

Norah Jones – Feels Like Home
Norah Jones – Not Too Late
The two latest albums of the beautiful singer-songwriter Norah Jones. They both make me feel warm and fuzzy inside, every time I listen to them.

Joy Division – Closer
The magnum opus of Joy Division themselves.

Loreena McKennitt – The Visit
The first (and best) travelling album by miss Loreena. Bewitching.

Killing Joke – Killing Joke
Killing Joke – Night Time
Killing Joke – Brighter Than A Thousand Suns
Killing Joke – Pandemonium
Killing Joke – Hosannas from the Basements of Hell
Killing Joke are one of the most interesting bands ever to emerge from the British post punk scenes in the 80s. Mostly because they never remained in the post punk scene for to long. Starting as an industrially-tinged funk punk band, they turned to danceable post punk later, and even later to bone-breaking industrial metal. And they excelled in any genre they chose to play. Killing Joke have been a great influence for bands like Metallica, Nirvana, Ministry, Tool, Korn and others.

Kyuss – Welcome to Sky Valley
Simply the gods of stoner rock. Mind expanding and bizarre.

Lacrimosa – Lichtgestalt
The German neoclassical gothic metal gods in their best album to date.

Led Zeppelin – IV
You know the chant: “best album of all time, bla bla bla…”. Well, they’re absolutely right!

Love and Rockets – The Very Best of
The greatest side project any member of Bauhaus ever produced. Kundalini Express forever.

Massive Attack – Blue Lines
Massive Attack – Menzanine
Massive Attack – 100th Window
If you don’t know these guys, you should be ashamed.

Sarah McLachlan – Touch
Sarah McLachlan – Fumbling Towards Ecstasy
Sarah Mc Lachlan is one of the most emotional and beautiful singer/songwriters around (together with Tori Amos, Joanna Newsom and Norah Jones). Her songs aren’t very original, but extremely emotional and beautiful.

Laibach – WAT
Another group of industrial pioneers, this time from Slowakia. This is where Rammstein got their sound from.

Lush – Spooky
Another great shoegaze band.

Mastodon – Blood Mountain
These are the new master of heavy metal. Bow to them.

Mazzy Star – So Tonight that I Might See
A beautifully opaque, dreamy and psychedelic album. Mazzy Star really hit the spot, here.

Mediaeval Baebes – Mirabillis
I always call them the Medieval Spice Girls, because of their sexiness. Although their music is a lot better than that of the Spice Girls 😛

Mephisto Walz – Insidious
Another American goth rock band.

Ministry – Psalm 69: The Way to Succeed and the Way to Suck Eggs
The magnum opus of these politically incorrect industrial anti-Bush fanatics.

Miranda Sex Garden – Suspiria
Another British goth rock band, but this time with three vocal frontwomen singing in choir. This is such a beautiful album… so wonderfully surrealistic and decadent. Simply perfect.

The Mission UK – Children
The Mission UK – Carved in Sand
The Mission UK – Grains of Sand
Together with the Sisters of Mercy and the Fields of the Nephilim, these guys here are the absolute heroes of goth rock. They’re majestic, pompous, theatrical and pretentious, but also romantic, emotional and magical.

Mogwai – Mr. Beast
The Scottish post rock champions, at their most accessible, yet most perfect.

Monster Magnet – Monolithic Baby!
YEAHHH!!!!!!

Moonspell – The Great White Eye
A best of of these Portuguese goth metallers. Simply a must for any goth metal fan (which I am not, but I like Moonspell).

Mozart – Requiem performed by the Wiener Philharmoniker and conducted by Herbert von Karajan
The most perfect recording of Mozart’s parade of doom and gloom. Probably the best Mozart recording ever.

múm – Yesterday was Dramatic, Today is OK
múm – Finally we are No One
Together with Sigur Rós and Björk, múm are the Icelandic superstars. And they write some of the most beautiful musics of the utmost North.

My Bloody Valentin – Loveless
This album has come to be one of my favorite albums of all time. Simply gorgeous how Bilinda Butcher’s soft voice balances atop of the wall of distortion and sound produced by Kevin Shields’ guitarwork. This is the artistic pinnacle of shoegaze.

Joanna Newsom – Ys
Joanna Newsom is, in my opinion, a true poet. Her lyrics are so revitalizing, beautiful and intricate. Her lyrics aside, her music is also extremely beautiful and intricate, and I personally consider it a great honor to have heard her music, let alone own one of her albums (which are also quite hard to find, here, for some reason).

Nevermore – This Godless Endeavour
Nevermore are, without doubt, one of the greatest metal bands from the Americas. Together with Mastodon, in my opinion, they’ve managed to create a whole new universe for metal musicians to explore.

Nightwish – Once
I’m in the awkward position of admitting that I actually really like this album. Pompous, intricate, and with totally pointless lyrics. Simply awesome.

Mike Oldfield – Tubular Bells
One of the “new age” albums that always manages to send shivers down my spire in its endless naiveté.

Opened Paradise – Occult
An obscure Greek goth rock/metal band, and one of the legions of Fields of the Nephilim copycats. I’ve seen them live at several occasions in Greece. I admit, they are not bad at all.

Opeth – Blackwater Park
Opeth – Ghost Reveries
These guys from Sweden are simply one of the best Scandinavian, or European for that matter, metal bands. I can’t really explain much of their music. One should listen for himself to understand their intricacy and mastery.

Ordo Rosarius Equilibrio – Coctail, Carnage, Crucifixion and Pornography
A wonderfully decadent neofolk/post industrial duo, indulging us in a beautiful journey through a world of debauchery, carnage and sex.

Pale Saints – In Ribbons
Another band that emerged from the British Shoegaze scene. These guys are less noisy than My Bloody Valentine, but still highly atmospheric and dark. And the cellos and other instruments they use really add to the atmosphere.

Paradise Lost – Paradise Lost
British gothic doom masters at one of their heaviest and least Depeche Mode-meets-Metallica moments. Pointless lyrics, crunching riffs, passionate vocals. If only I knew what the guy is really singing about…

Pixies – Doolittle
The masterpiece of the absolute alternative rock saints. The Pixies at their most psychotic.

Portishead – Dummy
This is really an apotheosis of trip hop. One of the most beautiful albums in that genre. Period.

Rage Against the Machine – Rage Against the Machine
Probably the first and last good album by these rapmetal motherfuckers. Politically incorrect, Marxist to the extreme, and simply genius. When I’m angry I tend to enjoy them screaming and shouting their crap all over the place.

Ride – Nowhere
One of the holy trinity of Shoegaze (together with Slowdive and, of course, My Bloody Valentine), Ride present their masterpiece. A simply beautiful “blue” album.

Queens of the Stone Age – Songs for the Deaf
QotSA are one of the biggest stoner bands around, and their music is simply great. Accessible, simple, and just pure, in-your-face rock.

Queensrÿche – Operation Mindcrime
An all-time classic from the 80s. Heavy metal at its most intellectual.

Rotting Christ – Theogonia
Rotting Christ are Greece’s very own black metal heroes. No wonder all their albums rock, even though their lyrics are garbage. No really, their lyrics are garbage, but, musically speaking, this album is really really great.

Erik Satie – Trois Gymnopédies and other piano works, performed by Aldo Ciccolini
Satie has always been one of my favorite composers, and his piano works have always been my favorite works by Satie. So this album is essential.

Alexander Scriabin – L’oeuvre pour piano, performed by Joseph Villa
Alexander Scriabin – Le Poéme de l’extase; Piano Concerto; Prométhée, performed by Anatol Ugorski, Chicago Symphony Orchestra and conducted by Pierre Boulez
Alexander Scriabin is another one of my absolute favorite composers. His music is pompous, atonal, mystical and mysterious. These are some of my proudest possessions in my collection.

Secret Garden – Songs from a Secret Garden
Another new age album that tends to be one of my shameful enjoyments. It’s so cheesy I just can’t resist!

Sex Gang Children – Blind
Sex Gang Children – Bastard Art
Sex Gang Children are one of the most psychotic and messed up goth rock bands out there. Simply sick. I like that.

Dmitry Shostakovich – String Quartets (Complete) Volume 4; Nos. 2 and 12, performed by Éder Quartet
Shostakovich is another favorite composer.

Sigur Rós – ( )
Sigur Rós – Takk…
The third part of the trinity from Iceland, Sigur Rós are one of the most beautiful post rock bands around. This music really has to be experienced.

Siouxsie and the Banshees – Juju
Siouxsie and the Banshees – Tinderbox
In my opinion the two best albums by the Banshees.

The Sisters of Mercy – First and Last and Always
The Sisters of Mercy – A Slight Case of Overbombing, Greatest Hits Vol. 1
The gothfathers are glorious. Whether they admit it or not, these guys are gothic as fuck. Even when Eldritch starts writing more pointless lyrics in his newer albums, hoping to make his music funny instead of moody and dark, he fails miserably. He still rocks badly, and he’s still the prince of dorkness.

Slayer – Reign in Blood
Harr harr harr!!!

Smashing Pumpkins – Adore
Smashing Pumpkins – Machina|The Machines of God
The Smashing Pumpkins have always been a controversial band, but I really like those two albums. Especially because they’re NOT their all-time classics (like Siamese Twins). They’re controversial works of art.

Sonic Youth – Daydream Nation
Another great, all-time classic band. Simply put, they rock.

Strange Boutique – The Collection: 1988 – 1994
Strange Boutique are one of the previous bands Monica Richards from Faith & the Muse was member of. Their music is shoegaze-y, lush, dreamy and pretty.

Igor Stravinsky – L’Oisseau de Feu; Le Sacre du Printemps; London Symphony Orchestra, conducted by Claudio Abbado
Stravinsky is another Russian composer I have a soft spot for. I practically grew up with the music of the Firebird (specifically a cover by Isao Tomita), so I bought this album to relive those times.

Sumerland – Sivo
Another mysterious band from somewhere in the Americas. These guys write mystical, ecstatic and pagan rock music, with lush soundscapes, tribal drumming and beautiful vocals.

Sufjan Stevens – Seven Swans
This guy is something like a male version of Norah Jones. Quiet, peaceful, folky and quirky. Indie folk at its purest and most innocent.

Therion – The Secret of the Runes
Therion – Lemuria/Sirius B
Therion – Gothic Kabbalah
Therion are the perfect crossover between symphonic music and heavy metal. Über-pompous, majestic, loud, symphonic. These guys are close to being my favorite metal band, were it not for their really really stupid lyrics. Musically speaking, these guys rock your ass off.

This Mortal Coil – It’ll End in Tears
A supergroup consisting of musicians signed by the legendary 4AD label. This project produced some of the darkest, most melancholic, mysterious and forbidding musics the label ever released. The album consists mostly of covers of obscure folk songs, and is simply brilliant.

Throbbing Gristle – D.o.A. The Third and Final Report of Throbbing Gristle
Throbbing Gristle – In the Shadow of the Sun
Part of the Industrial holy trinity, Throbbing Gristle have managed to create some of the most paranoid, noisy and disturbing works of art. Industrial music as it should be.

Yann Tiersen – Le Fabuleux Destin d’Amélie Poulain OST
A truly brilliant, imaginative and lovely piece of music. Tiersen really did a fine job in recreating the atmosphere of the movie in his music.

Emiliana Torrini – Love in a Time of Science
The pretty and talented trip hop musician from Iceland Emiliana, delivers a truly imaginative and finely crafted album.

Tristania – Illumination
The latest album of the Norse goth metal band, before the beautiful siren Vibeke Stene left the band. This album is less extreme than their previous works, and almost sounds like the goth rock from the late 80s. It’s really a nice album.

Type O Negative – Bloody Kisses
The American goth metal legends in all their glory. Dirty, brooding, dark and extremely funny.

Vangelis – Blade Runner OST
Vangelis – Chariots of Fire OST
Vangelis – Reprise
The Greek electronic guru has done some musical miracles we all have heard from time to time, but his Blade Runner soundtrack is, in my opinion, his magnum opus and one of the best soundtracks ever.

The Velvet Underground & Nico – The Velvet Underground & Nico
The Velvet Underground were, are and always will be one of the greatest band that emerged from New York in the 60s. This album, which, in my opinion, is one of their masterpieces, was made in collaboration with the pop art legend Andy Warhol. An unsettling album.

The Verve – This is Music: The Singles 92-98
The Verve are probably one of the most successful, yet short-lived shoegaze bands around. Their music is spacey, psychedelic and trippy. This album collects their best moments.

Richards Wagner – Die Walküre – Act 3; Orchester der Bayreuther Festspiele 1951; performed by Astrid Varnay, Leonie Rysanek, Sigurd Björling. Conducted by Herbert von Karajan
This is one of the oldest Wagner recordings available, and has been recorded in Bayreuth, in the theatre Wagner himself built. The sound quality is not the best, but the performance is simply brilliant.

Wolfmother – Wolfmother
Who doesn’t know those guys today? Hard rock in true 70s style, like it should be. It’s unbelievable these guys are from the 00s.

Iannis Xenakis – Persepolis
The Greek pioneer of European avant-garde/noise music at his finest. This music was written for the former Iranian dictator Muhammad Reza Shah in 1971, and is an extremely pompous rendition of noises, screams and other sound effects.

Xmal Deutschland – Fetisch
Xmal Deutschland – Tocsin
Another great band from the 4AD label. Xmal Deutschland are Siouxsie and the Banshees copycats in the extreme (although on Tocsin they start building their own sound), and are gothic rock as it’s meant to be. Two of my most prized possessions (also because these albums are extremely hard to get).

In Dubio

I went to my study progress coach (studieloopbaancoach, in Dutch) a few days ago, to talk about my choices in my studies. I had been thinking to stop with visual arts teacher training, the faculty I’ve been following this year on the Willem de Kooning Academy, and switch to autonomous visual arts, where I’d be able to focus on my art, an on my thoughts, abstractions and philosophies on art. My coach, however, although he did admit that art teacher might not be the right path for me, he also had his doubts about autonomous visual arts. He said that, although my outlook, personality and way of thinking may be just right, my artistic endeavors, visually speaking, leave things to be desired, especially for autonomous visual arts, where I’d have to produce an enormous amount of objects. My working progress wasn’t the way they wanted it either. I tend to think of an idea, make some sketches of it, and then make the final object, where they want me to come with several ideas, and test different compositions and positions for the ideas, and then make lots of scetches, etc. Also, he said, I tend to think way too much about my ideas, instead of working physically on them, resulting in less interesting works, visually, however interesting they might be conceptually.

The whole discussion led to the conclusion, that I’m more mentally-oriented, rather than physically, in art. In his opinion (and the opinion of several friends and classmates) I am a true thinker. And that is something he observed in the theory classes, as well, for my capacity to debate, and think long on several topics that might interest me. His advice, therefore, was – and I’ve been thinking of that option before, but more as an option for after my studies – to see if perhaps I would be more interested in studying philosophy, instead of autonomous visual arts. I would get the same freedom as in autonomous visual arts, without having to make such huge amounts of art.

What a thought was that! I admit, the identity crisis I’ve been suppressing for some time, at this moment, reappeared more stronger than ever. So the question is: Philosopher or artist? Rational or Intuitive? Mental or physical? Thought or action? What the f*ck am I? Can I afford to be both?

In my personal analyses, I have come to the conclusion, that I am deeply dualistic by nature. There are two forms of intelligence, rationality and intuition, and where most people tend to lean towards one of the two, I have come to sit somewhere on a thin line between them, leading to enormous contradictions within my behavior. The following analysis is symbolic, I suffer no multiple personality disorder, but this is a way to explain how those polarities within me work.

So, on the one hand you have my philosophical side, Alexander. Alexander is (as the name suggests – “protector of mankind”) is a rationalist, sometimes a little conservative, always observative, and always up to a debate. Alexander tends to try to look on a cosmic scale, trying to fit everything inside a pattern. Alexander appears to be incomprehensible to most people. He tends to be refined, well-mannered and calm.

On the other hand there is Nikolaos (victory of the people), the artistic side. Nikolaos works completely on impulse. He never thinks too much about the things he does. He is emotional, and is prone to extreme mood swings, wanting nothing more than to kick something the one moment, and being almost blissfully happy the next. Nikolaos relies on his intuition to solve problems, and looks at a smaller scale than Alexander, seeing small, beautiful things where no one would think to look. Nikolaos is warm and friendly, but less refined than Alexander. When he gets angry (when I get angry, this side of me usually gets the upper hand) he can be uncontrollable, ruthless and terrible. But, fortunately, that doesn’t happen often.

The problem with both aspects is that they’re both extroverted and stubborn, resulting in an enormous conflicts within myself from time to time.
And that conflict is exactly what’s happening now.

I always thought, for about 12 years now, that art was the only real option for me. I could only draw. I was horrible at school, I was horrible at sports until I started fencing, so my only path was art. I discovered philosophy and rhetorics about two years ago, and it stuck with me.

So here I am, debating with myself whether I should study art or philosophy.
(Perhaps I should see an expert…)

Who the f*ck am I?

Hmm… I suppose no one’s reading this blog anyway, but I thought I’d start writing something about myself. Inspired by someone else on one of the e-communities I hang around sometimes, I decided to make a list of things that define me… About a 100+ things. After reading all of this you can officially consider yourselves Ph.D.’s in Alexandrology.

So, here goes nothing:

1. I am a Greek-Dutch crossbreed (Greek father, Dutch mother), born in Germany, and grown up in both Berlin and Athens.

2. My full name is Nikolaos Alexander Arvanitis, though I swapped the order of the first two names lately, so now it’s Alexander Nikolaos Arvanitis. Friends usually call me Alex, Ali, or Alexander, family knows my as Nikos or Niko (sometimes Flippo, Nick the Greek or something like that).

3. My names mean a lot to me. They define who I am. Alexander means “protector of mankind”, in Greek, and Nikolaos means “victory of the people”. Yes, it sounds pompous, but, as I said, that’s who I am. A pompous guy.

4. I am a Virgo in western astrology.

5. I am a Dragon (of the element of Earth) in Chinese Astrology.

6. You can see which astrological discipline I prefer, no? (harr harr)

7. I have lived 11 years in Germany and 8 years in Greece. I’ve been calling the Netherlands my home since summer 2007.

8. I do have an aptitude for languages, so I speak Greek, German, Dutch and English quite fluently, and a liiiiittle French as well, and I’m now trying to learn Icelandic. Later I want to learn Spanish and some other languages too. I tried learning Japanese about two years ago… It didn’t go too well, mostly because I lacked the time necessary.

9. I love culture, language and people.

10. I love anything that has to do with language. Poetry, literature, anagrams and other word games, interlinguistic jokes (that’s something I grew up with… my father used to change dutch words into greek ones, giving them a whole new meaning), and rhetoric.

11. I admire people who can speak like they’re reciting a poem, without reciting a poem, but using similar vocabulary possibilities. I like the way Peter Greenaway talks, for example, or Richard Dawkins, or, best of all, Blixa Bargeld. I want to be able to talk that way (although lots of people assure me that I talk very well).

12. Voice. I love everything that has to do with voice. It defines people. I do many things with my voice. I recite stuff, I sing a lot, I talk a lot, etc.

13. I love people who do unique things with their voice. People who reach some kind of higher conscience through their voice, like Lisa Gerrard, Elisabeth Fraser or Björk. Another thing I’d like to achieve someday.

14. I was grown up as a devout Christian Orthodox, but the past few years I’ve been experimenting with a lot of crap. Paganism, for example, or New Age, Hermeticism, Reiki, Pantheism, etc… It’s all a bunch of bullshit, really.

15. I have 5 brothers. I’m the oldest.

16. Their names are Sebastian, Gennadios, Porphyrios, Theophilos and Laurens.

17. Sebastian turned to the Islam quite recently. I think it’s funny. He probably thinks I’m stupid.

18. Gennadios is a skaterboy (and I must say, his skating is decent) and doesn’t really like art, spirituality, religion, philosophy and all of that abstract crap, but he still is one of my favourite brothers.

19. Porphyrios is even weirder than I was in his age. I admire him, because he is extremely strong (mentally and physically).

20. Theophilos is a little genius, and I’m really anxious to see what the future has in store for him.

21. Laurens is still a baby. He’s 18 years younger than myself. When he gets 18, I’ll be 36 years old. I feel fucking old already.

22. My mother, Ariadne, is a musicologist, teacher and professional singer (coloratura sopran), and my father, Ioannis, is an architect, but works for a Greek archaeological visual reality company.

23. One could call me an anarchist. Ideologically speaking. I’m not one of those “anarchist” types smashing everything in their wake. Still, I don’t like rules, or conventions, or society as it is now, for that matter.

24. I’m studying Art Teacher Training at the Willem de Kooning Academy in Rotterdam, although I want to switch to autonomous Visual Arts. I don’t think I’m much of a teacher.

25. I am a Sensationist (also known as Empirist), which means I try to experience as much sensations as possible. I want to see, smell, touch, taste and hear as many different things as possible. One cannot know some things if not experienced first hand.

26. I like to cook, but I’m not really good at it. But I’m learning.

27. I love music. Period.

28. Music is art. Period.

29. Music that isn’t art, isn’t music.

30. Music that IS art is always welcome to my ears. Though music that ISN’t art will be listened to as well (see number 25), for the sake of experience.

31. I love art.

32. I love noise.

33. I love chaos… I really do.

34. I record noises from the streets to incorporate in my music.

35. My room is a mess.

36. Like in “I can’t walk around in there anymore” mess.

37. My family is an international bunch of weirdos… I love my family. It’s like some messed up soap.

38. I am a weirdo too.

39. I am somehow a very controversial person. I can be solitary yet social, a brave coward, a modest egomaniac, I am hot-headed yet calm, all at once.

40. I am a hopeless romantic. People say I’m naïve, but I don’t give a crap.

41. I may very well be naïve.

42. … a little.

43. I am addicted to cafeïne (coffee… I love coffee), chocolate, milk, milk chocolate, nicotine (cigarettes, cigars, pipes etc.), sensations, and, last but not least, oxygen.

44. I see myself as an aspiring artist, musician, poet and philosopher. People tend to respect the fact I use the words “aspiring” and “artist” in the same sentence. I think it’s stupid.

45. I play games. Dungeons & Dragons and Warhammer 40,000 are some of my favourites. People call me a nerd from time to time. I don’t give a crap.

46. People have called me a lot of acronyms, like Nick the Greek, Cowboy Billy Bob, Flippo, Ali, Nick Gothick (when I was still a goth), Alexander the Gray, The Pink Panther, etc. I kinda like it when they do that.

47. People have mentioned me looking like an elf, sometimes like a pig (because of my nose), like Michael Jackson (because of my nose), or a cowboy (because of my hat, in combination with leather boots, jeans etc.), even though my hat is made of cangaroo leather, and thus of Australian origin, and not American. The most accurate comparison is the Pink Panther. Same posture, same dry sense of humor, etc. (by the way, the pink panther theme rocks)

48. I love debates.

49. I love CDs. I always buy CDs. I dislike mp3s, although I do use them more often than not.

50. I like people as individuals, and like to get to know more people like that. I hate people in masses.

51. I am slightly agoraphobic. I get dizzy when walking through big crowds.

52. I love trains.

53. I love traveling, though, until now, I didn’t have too much of a chance to do that a lot.

54. When I make art, I like to think as abstractly as possible. Heck, I like to think as abstractly as possible at almost every situation.

55. I like movies. Mostly arthouse stuff. But I like movies in general.

56. Reading. One of my passions. I won’t get in too much trouble writing all the authors I like down, but suffice to say, I love reading.

57. I don’t like religion. I, personally, adhere to theories of subjective reality. Everyone creates his own world, so we all live in different worlds, yet still somehow we interact with each other, etc… I have a whole theory on this. If you want to know, just ask me.

58. I like to think I know myself. At least, that’s my ultimate goal.

59. I’m not really a lucky guy, but when I am lucky, I’m so damn lucky you won’t believe it.

60. I am damn forgetful with things. I rarely walk outside my home without having forgotten my wallet, or my bag, or my cell phone or something like that.

61. But I never (and I mean NEVER) forget any faces, even though names are a wee bit harder to remember for me.

62. I am stoned by nature, so you can count on me being zoned out more often than not. When I’ve smoked crap I’m much worse.

63. I play a few instruments, but none very well, like mandolin, piano, violin and mouth harp (well that’s not hard to play). I do have a piano on my room, which totally rocks (both the piano, and having a piano).

64. I’m not sure which half of my brain I use mostly. Sometimes I totally go by impulse, others I’m as rationalistic as a computer. I guess it’s that duality in me… Alexander vs. Nikolaos or something.

65. You could call me a schizo, though I highly doubt this is the case.

66. Scrap that.

67. Ahem… I suppose one could call me decadent, in the way Symbolist artists and writers used the word in the late 19th century.

68. I dislike the postmodern world (the time we’re in).

69. I hate capitalist society, even though I know I’m a hypocrite in doing so, since I am a part of it, and I know I (probably) won’t be able to shake that off anytime soon.

70. I like people who dare to be who they are.

71. I like girls with little or no make-up, for example.

72. I do not believe in utopias, heaven, perfect places, better places and all of that crap. I believe in our world, and I believe in what we make of it.

73. I never regret my decisions. I regret my indecisions.

74. When it comes to girls, I’m not shy, although I can get if it gets more personal.

75. For some reason I am obsessed with my homeland, Greece. I can’t stop comparing everything with things there. Good or bad. People often get annoyed by that habit. Others make fun of it.

76. I love all the countries I come from.

77. I’ve learned not to judge nationalities, but people.

78. And hell, I can judge people!

79. I enjoy sexual intercourse (who doesn’t), although it’s been quite a while.

80. My favourite movements in art are Romanticism, Symbolism, Dada, Surrealism and Suprematism.

81. My favourite art disciplines are installation art, painting, audivisual art, video art and sculpture.

82. Some people think I’m arrogant. They may be right, maybe I am a little.

83. But I’m really a nice guy.

84. For some reason I have always deified redheads… I just love that colour.

85. I think I’d look sexy with facial hair. I think lots of men look sexy with facial hair.

86. I’m used to being made fun of.

87. I gladly discuss everything you can throw at me.

88. I’m not much of a sportsman, though I’ve followed fencing lessons for about six years. I want to start again soon enough.

89. I have more physical and mental endurance than strength, so one could say I have “red”, rather than “white” power (and that might sound racist… geez, am I glad I’m not such a white power person :P).

90. I supposedly have an IQ rate of 132, although for some reason I don’t think I’m really smart.

91. In a movie, I would either play the bad guy (probably a vampire, or something like that), or the mysterious guy who sometimes helps the protagonist with some information or something. In a romance movie I would probably be the loser best friend of the protagonist, who for some reason doesn’t have a girlfriend. I would probably play a protagonist role in an arthouse movie.

92. I haven’t had much luck in my love life, but for some reason I don’t mind. The eternal search for happiness (which is something I don’t really believe in the way most people do) makes my life very interesting.

93. I am obsessed with getting to know people thoroughly. I am fascinated with the fact that even the most boring-looking person has some crazy story to tell about his past.

94. I always love to tell my own story (take this post here, for example).

95. The funniest anagram of my name I could think of is “Viral Sex Stoned Iranian Koala”. Other alternatives include “Stoned Axial Nirvana Skier”, “El-Salvadore Iranian Saxon Kit”, “Indonesian Laxative Solar Ark”, and “Inordinate Klaxon Saliva Arse”.

96. I look up to my great-grandfather, the painter, poet, and philosopher Laurens van Kuyk. In fact, together with Mondriaan (who was a good friend of his, as well), he was one of the pioneers of abstract art in the Netherlands. Sadly, his work never got the recognition it truly deserved.

97. When I listen to music, I have to hear every note. So each time music is playing I am completely zoned out. The term “background music”, to me, is completely useless/inexistent.

98. I hate holidays created solely for debauchery and/or spending even more money (examples: Valentine’s day, Christmas, Carnival or the birthday of the queen of the Netherlands). I mean, can’t we just fornicate and drink and toil with temptation and decadence all year long (I must say, the idea is rather tempting)?

99. I’m an honest guy. I discovered at a young age that it’s impossible for me to lie – for some reason people always see it in my face – so now, I just don’t.

100. I am prone to hysterical fits of laughter.

101. I am prone to extreme mood swings. Being very depressed one week, and totally happy the next.

102. I love being myself. I love this life, I’m living. With all it’s ups and downs, and crazy shit, it’s still the best life I could wish for. It’s like some crazy, surrealist movie, with a duration of about 80 years, or so.

103. Finally, this list is far from complete. You can always ask me some stuff personally, if you really want to know me. Like any sensationist’d say (well, at least, I would): “You can read it, but you’ll have to experience it first hand if you REALLY want to know it.”

That’s who I am.

Gathering Shards Bonus Track

You can now download the bonus track for the Gathering Shards album.

12 A Midnight Walk

The Visionary of Dust – Gathering Shards

This is my debut music album. I recorded the pieces some time between January 2006 and March 2008, so it spans about two years of writing.

The album is exclusively home-recorded, for the most part on my laptop (though several noises, especially on the track Aposynthese have been recorded with my mobile). It features ambient and ambient dub soundscapes, harsh noise, spoken word and acoustic pieces (with mandolin, cello and piano). I tried to cover several genres because I wanted to show several aspects of myself, my vision and my art. The spoken word tracks feature the two poems which I have posted on this blog, while the third one is of another poem I wrote in Greek (so most people probably won’t understand it).

One of the acoustic tracks, In Splendor, features cello and vocals by Daphne Farazi, a friend of mine in Greece, daughter of Takis Farazis, one of the greatest jazz pianists Greece has the honor to offer. The track was originally recorded for the project I am working on with her, called The 7th Veil, but I decided to include it on this album as well. If and when we record anything new with Daphne you’ll probably hear of In Splendor again.

Other than that, this album is for free, and protected under copyleft rights, which means you have every right to make as many copies as you want and share it with friends, or people you want to annoy with strange musics.

01. Dolores

02. Esther

03. A Catalyst

04. Insistence/Existence

05. Tread Lightly, A Dream Lies Sleeping

06. Aposynthese

07. Changing Tides

08. Πτώσις 108

09. In Splendour

10. Visions of Dust

11. The Cube of Metatron

My views on religion and atheism.

I’ve been reading Richard Dawkins’ “The God Delusion”, which is a highly praised and extremely interesting book on atheism. He aspires (quite successfully, if I may say so) to disprove god’s existence, and to show the gullibility of religious organizations and people who follow them. He makes very clear and accurate points and arguments, and manages to make the atheist lifestyle, usually seen as “bleak” or “pessimistic”, seem attractive indeed.
With this book in mind, and with the many researches, conversations and experiments I had in the past in relation to religion and theology, I decided to write my conclusion on the subject. To begin with, I decided to call myself an atheist, but my interpretation of the word is very different of the one that’s usually meant when referring to it. I am a person who has tried many a time, and to no avail, different forms of belief. I have grown up a christian, later went on searching around for other beliefs and practices, like Wicca, reiki, hinduism… I even thought of a theory (inspired by the, rather eccentric beliefs of Alexander Scriabin) of how a human being, as an individual, not as a race, with all of his actions influencing every part of the world, perhaps even the universe, is, as a matter of fact, a god. All these beliefs, even though I really wished to be able to believe them, did nothing but produce a feeling of passive hypocrisy in myself, and that was the reason to move on to the next belief system, for I, at least, understand now that, if something does not feel right, something is amiss, which is my first argument against a belief system… And the worst gut feeling I get everytime I meet people who follow one or another belief, is their fanaticism… The fact that, whatever you do or are or say, they will try to persuade you how right their belief is. That is my second doubting point: How can something be so right and perfect and good, if people can get so ravingly mad about it (even though, I must admit, I myself am not much better than that… I can get extremely passionate about my views, whether political or philosophical)? And then comes my third argument, which is actually closely connected to the first: If it is the absolute truth, why can I doubt it? Why is it then so difficult to accept, for example, that Allah, or whoever, created the universe if nothing existed before him? When I think of truth I think of something that’s so devastatingly real that no evidence would be necessary. When I see a chair I know it’s a chair. I know its purpose, and I know it’s there. If this is not the case, then I have every reason to doubt it (even though every doubt would probably disappear with enough evidence). So suffice to say that I don’t like religion, and I don’t like fundamentalism as much as I don’t like people who adher to them with such fanaticism (not passion, mind you, it’s a small difference). I also am quite reluctant to respect such beliefs, because I consider them foolish, because, the way I see it, if God were to exist, he probably would’ve much better things to keep him busy than us.
So here comes my interpretation of the word atheist: “atheism” comes from the greek word “theos”, which means god, and the prevative “a-“, which indicates something that does not exist, or is absent. The word atheism is normally used to indicate the nonexistence of a god. My interpretation, however, indicates non-belief in any god. Which means that, even though god may or may not exist, I simply do not care. I am too selfish to care. Which means that, even if I would know for certain some god existed, I would not pray, nor ask him for help, nor let him make decisions for me. If I knew he created me, I’d reckon he gave me hands, eyes, ears, legs etc. for a reason, and thus I would utilize them appropriately. Thus I do not believe in god, and I do not care if he exists or not. What I do believe, and what I do care exists, are myself, my friends, family and loved ones, the world around me, the people around me, and the things I can experience. These things are tangible, and these things are worth fighting for. People who give their lives for their gods are fools. People who try to convince others of their beliefs are fools. People who believe in god are not necessarily fools, but most of them give the rest a bad name. If I do something good, I do not do it because my god dictates me to, but for the satisfaction I receive by doing it, and for the love and gratitude others might show to me, when I help them. If I do something bad, I do not fear my god’s punishment, but the consequence of my action, not in the afterlife, but yet in this one. I do not think one requires a religion, or a god, to be a morally better person. One requires knowledge of his actions, that is all.
That said, I have to admit there are some things I can believe in, but they do not require the existence of a god, as it were. For example I do believe in what we call a soul, even if it’s just sparks in our brains, these sparks are energy, and that energy always recycles itself, so, technically speaking, our soul is immortal. I also can accept theories on what we call “magic” (which I think is the same as art: the creative use of energy), auras (which is simply the body heat of a being, and it might be possible to read one’s personality from it), and some other minor things, whose existence may or may not be proven scientifically in the future.
To conclude I want to say that we should not waste ourselves to faith. We should live our lives as much as we can. Perhaps reincarnation waits for us, but perhaps we’ve got only this once. So just in case, try to be healthy, try to be good, and try to be happy. If god would exist, he would want nothing more from us than to be happy, anyway.
-Alexander N. Arvanitis

The Cube of Metatron

They’ve lost their minds in blind defense;
they’ve lost their sight, their innocense
in their pretense of knowledge.

Dominion is all we’ve known…
Oblivion is all we’ve thrived for
with our tired mindsets.

So much… that I’m led to believe,
that all we ever feel is grief…
When we raise up our heads
and pray…

We’ve failed to recognize the stars,
we’ve failed to know the words that we learned,
when the world was still young…

They spoke of snowy mountaintops,
they spoke of forests and of oceans,
but we failed to see them.

And yet I am full of hope,
that man can break the spell of ignorance,
and live once more
in a golden age of freedom.

They think they know the Godly truth,
words and commandments of aeons past,
written by their sages…

But the truth lies within our grasp,
it lies in our hearts and minds,
and our very senses…

And thus we’ll reach enlightenment,
through this hour of revelation.
The cube of Metatron is thrown,
And Osiris’ parts reassembled,
our choices will be vital…